


Reasons

by WolfinaMeadow (orphan_account)



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Fear, Fear of Discovery, Female Pronouns for Pidge | Katie Holt, Fluff and Angst, Galra Keith (Voltron), Gay Keith (Voltron), Hurt Keith (Voltron), Hurt/Comfort, Jealousy, Keith (Voltron) is a Mess, Lance (Voltron) is a Mess, Lots of Angst, Love, M/M, Post-Season/Series 04, Sad Keith (Voltron), Sad with a Happy Ending, Self-Discovery, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, Some Fluff, Some Humor, Takes a very long time, everyone is a mess, just a warning, so so slow
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-23
Updated: 2018-01-10
Packaged: 2019-02-19 05:18:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 11,056
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13116873
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/WolfinaMeadow
Summary: He remembers using the tricks his dad taught him to hunt for food, sometimes only eating lizard for weeks. He remembers how when his dad was finally gone, buried and out of sight. He had curled up on the porch and sobbed for hours, breaking the rule once again. He remembers looking at the stars and wishing he could be up there, space was so vast. So pretty and open, surely there was something out there.Surely there was someone out there who would love him, allow him to cry, maybe even a family, a huge big space family where they could fight monsters and watch power rangers and hug together.Surely he wouldn't be alone.__________________A fic focusing on Keith, a self distrucive paladin who doesnt seem to realize his limits.Join him as he discovers himslef and his relationship with others as well as he learns to trust and to let go of all the hate and sadness inside.And figure out that maybe there is a reason for everything.





	1. The reason for Space.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic so please be gentle!  
> its quite short since its only an introduction, but i hope you guys like it.

The thing, Keith felt about space, was that it was so big.

 

No, not big.

 

_ Vast.  _

 

_ A never ending place that was filled with just  _ everything.

 

Maybe that's what had drawn him at such a young age.

 

* * *

 

  
  


In a small shack, a father sat with his son. Neither knew what was to come, if they did, then maybe the world would have been a lot safer for little Keith. Maybe it would have been easier for him to know where he belonged. Maybe he would have gotten hurt less.

 

But for now, the two sat together on the couch mourning the same thing for the opposite reason.

 

“Papa?”

 

“Yes Keith?” 

 

“Why did mama leave us?”

 

The man had anticipated this question, but it still hurt to hear the words come from his small boys mouth. The bundle of blankets and sadness in his arms had nothing to do with this, with the wars and the death. He couldn't tell him.

 

“She had to go somewhere far away”

 

“How far?

 

“Very far”

 

“For how long?”

 

“A long time”

 

“When will she come back, papa?”

 

“I don't think she will son”

And that's when Keith, tiny and young and such a child, broke. Tears pooling in his eyes he looked away from the man holding him, he knew he wasn't supposed to cry as often as he did, but it was hard. His voice wasn't the only thing shaking.

 

“But why! She loves us?”

 

it shouldn't have sounded like a question, it should have came out as a statement, even little Keith knew that.

 

But little Keith also knew not to make a statement unless he was sure it was correct.

 

His papa wasn't answering, which Keith knew was never good, slowly he slid out of the blankets and his papa’s arms, question time was over.

 

Instead of having another one next week like usual, Keith’s dad took him out and taught him how to hunt.

 

His papa died two months later, before he could ever get another one.

 

Keith didn't remember much of it, he didn't  remember the fact that even at a young age he knew from movies that if someone knew about the death, he'd get taken away. He didn't remember using the some of the money his dad left to get someone to bury his dad. Didn't remember how he found someone to pretend to be his dad during parent teacher meeting.

 

But there were some things he did.

He remembers using the tricks his dad taught him to hunt for food, sometimes only eating lizard for weeks. He remembers how when his dad was finally gone, buried and out of sight. He had curled up on the porch and sobbed for hours, breaking the rule once again. He remembers looking at the stars and wishing he could be up there, space was so  _ vast _ . So pretty and open, surely there was something out there.

 

Surely there was someone out there who would love him, allow him to cry, maybe even a family, a huge big space family where they could fight monsters and watch power rangers and hug together.

 

Surely he wouldn't be alone.

 

* * *

 

 

When Keith had been in space for two months, he realized how wrong he was, even in space, he wouldn't have anyone, except maybe Shiro.

 

When Keith had been in space for eight months, Shiro disappeared, and everything he knew, his entire solar system, was out of whack.

 

When Keith had been in space for nine months, he realized he liked Lance, it didn't matter, there were more important things to deal with, the crush would go away on its own or it wouldn't. Shiro came back, Keith was happy until he realized how much the man had changed.

 

When Keith had been in space for eleven months, he quit team Voltron, he wasn't needed anymore, and he knew it was for the best, he was getting to attached to this team, and they did nothing but hurt him. Point out his faults, joke about his loneliness, call him selfish, they didn't try to stop him when he left.

 

It was for the best.

 

When Keith had been in space for eleven and a half months, he almost hurled himself into a force field, and was saved by the one person he wanted dead the most, after maybe himself.

 

Keith wanted to go far away.

 

He wanted to be gone a long time.

 

He didn't want to come back.

 

Except he really did. 

 


	2. The reason for healing pods

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There was an aura of familiarity radiating from the Paladins, a sense of comfort through small words and touches that showed how much they meant to each other, and watching it suddenly left Keith feeling a pang in his chest.
> 
> He used to be a part of that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter!
> 
> Anyway it isn't anything much, this is just a fic I'm writing in my spare time.
> 
> Comments are appreciated.

Keith hated healing pods, they were so small and cramped, and they allowed everyone to see exactly what was wrong with you, which was a complete lack of privacy. And Keith liked his privacy very much.

When he joined the blade of marmora, he’d almost been thankful for the fact they didn't have them. If you got hurt, you dealt with it. Keith could do that.

Keith could not handle being stuck in a healing pod for some small burns he'd gotten while flying out of the explosion when there were people a lot more injured than him. He couldn't handle knowing the paladins were standing right outside.

Knowing that Matt had told them what had happened.

Knowing that fucking _Lotor_ , of all people, was the only reason Keith was alive.

Fucking Lotor was _outside the pod_ somewhere, doing Quiznack knows what, and that no one had probably killed him yet. He wasn't dead yet.

He would be as soon as Keith could get to him.

 

So Keith spent the time he was stuck here trying to regain his consciousness, concentrating on emotions that would get him out faster.

Building up his walls.

So when Keith felt it opening, and was brought out of that awful half conscious state to find the entire room filled to the brim with people,he didn't have to spend anytime bring himself out of a daze, his first response was tonlook around for a familiar face.

He scanned the room silently, ignoring the few pair of eyes staring him down, and found himself facing his old team.

Keith felt his walls break.

They hadn't noticed him yet, Allura and Shiro spoke to rulers of planets Keith had forgotten the names of, Pidge seemed to be in an intense conversation with Matt, Coran was running around, trying to cheer up the patients, and Hunk and Lance were just wandering about. They weren't watching him, so Keith took a second to stare. They looked the same as when he had last seen them in persons, a little more worse for the ware, but otherwise the same.

There was an aura of familiarity radiating from the Paladins, a sense of comfort through small words and touches that showed how much they meant to each other, and watching it suddenly left Keith feeling a pang in his chest.

 _He used to be a part of that_.

And now Keith was nothing but another disposable member of the Blade, throwing himself into danger again and again till he finally died.

A few hours ago was the closest he'd come.

Keith had shot himself straight towards the force field, straight to what he thought would be his death, and the only thing that had been on his mind was that he had to protect his family.

These people were his _family_

Pidge, with her stupid fake glasses and dumb facts he would never admit he loved hearing, the girl was so young, so brave and sarcastic and Keith felt a small swell of pride at the thought of her.

Hunk, who made the best snacks and gave the best hugs (though Keith had only been apart of a few of them). Hunk’s bravery and kindness radiated like sunbeams, and Keith knew that as sweet as he seemed, Hunk was hardcore. Keith secretly respected that.

Allura, who Keith had taken a while to warm up to, but had grown to care about like a sister. Keith hadn't blamed her for her anger at Keith’s heritage. But the fact that Allura had grown to care about him nonetheless sent a pang through him. The princess had gone through so much, lost so many, but yet managed to make a home within others. Keith would never admit his jealousy out loud.

Coran, did he really require an explanation? Coran reminded Keith of a crazy aunt, expect well, a male. The man had no idea what he was doing half the time, and improvised more often than not. Keith admired him though, the man had gone through a lot, but he still managed to put on a show.

Shiro, Keith would have had a lot to say about him a few months ago. But with all the arguments going on and the transition between Voltron and the Blade. Keith felt as if Shiro was a brother that was neglecting his job. Not that it was his job. Shiro wasn't to blame, he'd gone through so much. Yet he continued to be the best leader the team could ask for.

Then there was Lance.

Keith watched him pacing the room, his hair was ruffled as if he'd run his hand through it a million times, he was still in his armor and the dark red rims around his eyes showed that he hadn't slept in a while.

Keith also noticed Lance had been crying, a thing he'd noticed in the other paladins too.

Lance was a lot of things, he was flirtatious, annoying and he didn't seem to know when to shut up.

But Lance was also endearing, he was loyal, he was strong. Keith had seen him in action, brave and furiously handsome, he was the teams sharpshooter.

Lance was also kind, so unbearably kind and caring. The boy wasn't afraid to show off what he was feeling, and was always trying to prove that he belonged on the team.

As if anyone would have ever even thought he didn't.

The thing about feelings, Keith thought, was that if they were for someone else, it was best to accept them, and than immediately ignore them, other methods never ended well.

Keith would distract himself from thinking about the paladins, training himself to death during his spare time so that he wouldn't ponder over them, not even for a moment.

But then there were those small moments, vulnerable times where Keith would wait till the other Blades had fallen asleep, and with forbidden tears in his eyes, begin to draw.

Sometimes he'd draw the entire team.

Sometimes it was a sole person.

Most times, it was Lance.

Lances face, his body, his arms. His homesick ocean eyes that reminded Keith of a place on Earth he'd never seen.

Those eyes were staring right at him right this second.

 _Shit._ He thought, and proceeded to watch in horror as Lance silently alarmed the other paladins of his consciousness, unwavering eyes never leaving him.

 _Fuckity Quiznack. Shit shit shit_.

He'd been caught.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So yeah, I know it's a little different from the first chapter, but it's on purpose.
> 
> I've been trying to show the drastic difference between how Keith feels,and what he lets himself think.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed!


	3. The reason for running.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “What the quiznack Lance?!”
> 
> “Me?! you were the one running away like you were being chased by a bunch of hooligans!”
> 
> “Thats because I was you asshast!”
> 
> “You were the one running away! What else were we supposed to do?!”
> 
> “Leave me the fuck alone! Ever thought of that?!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter as this years Christmas present!
> 
> (a day before Christmas cause the chapter sucks)

Keith was the stupidest quiznacking (part) human alive.  
  
If you had said that to him maybe yesterday, he would have been baited into an argument.

He wasn't stupid, a little reckless maybe, but he usually knew what he was doing.

Running through the empty corridors Keith realized that he very much, did not know what he was doing.

This was the absolute worst decision Keith had ever made, and now he was running through the only area of the castle he had not explored yet, with seven maniacs running after him.

_Great_.

“Keith slow down!”

“Yah! We just want to talk!”

“Saying that’ll just make him run faster you dumbass!”

Keith turned the corner.

_Fuck_.

He hated running.

Once hed told Shiro this and all he’d gotten was a strange look. “I thought you liked training”.

Keith had said nothing. _Training and running aren't the same thing._

_When your training, your always training for something._

_For practice._

_For fun._

_For war._

_When your running, your always running away from something._

_Even if you end up running towards something, you end up **away** from something else._

_**Away**   
Here he was, running away once again._

Keith was sure he had lost them. His muscles were aching, and he knew that his body wasn't fit for such exercise after just healing. He’d lost them. Maybe he could stop for a seco-

Lance hurled his body on to Keith, and for a second Keith thought he could keep his balance.

Nope.

The two boys went crashing down on top of each other in a painful mess of arms and legs.

“What the quiznack Lance?!”

“Me?! you were the one running away like you were being chased by a bunch of hooligans!”

“Thats because I was you asshast!”

“You were the one running away! What else were we supposed to do?!”

“Leave me the fuck alone! Maybe?!”

Keith was going to kill him.

He’d finally untangled himself from Lance when the rest of the team caught up.

He had nowhere to run, he’d just have to face whatever they were going to say.

Shiro silently bent down and helped him up.

No one looked him in the eye, he’d have to start the conversation.

“Where's Lotor?”

“Locked up in the dungeon, we’d like to interrogate him as soon as possible, but we need to get some things out of the way first.”

Allura looked straight at him then, and Keith knew that they wanted an explanation.

He wasn't going to give them one.

“There's nothing to get out of the way.”

“You know exactly what i'm speaking about Keith”

“I do, but i really don't care”

Keith wanted this to finish, he didn't want to talk, he wanted to go to bed, he wanted to sleep or do something useful, talking never helped anyone.

To everyone’s surprise, it was Hunk who broke the silence.

He walked right up to Keith, and Keith couldn't help but notice the tears pooling in the boy’s eyes.

He’d made Hunk cry.

Hunk lifted a shaky arm up and poked keith right in the chest.

It hurt a lot more than it should have, he had the feeling it had nothing to do with the physical pain.

“ _Keith_.”

Poke.

“ _Don't you dare”_

Poke.

_“Quiznacking say_ ”

Poke.

“ _There's nothing_ ”

Poke.

_“To talk_ ”

Poke.

“ _About_!”

The poking stopped. And Hunk’s hand went limp, the volume of his voice decreased, his head dropped, and tears slid down his face silently.

Keith felt so ashamed.

“ You almost fucking _died_ Keith”

Another heavy breath.

“ you almost died, and none of us _knew_ , and you didn't even give a crap Keith! You can-can't, yo-you can't do that you selfish prick. What were you thinking”

What had Keth been thinking?

_I was thinking about you guys_.

  
“ I- I was- It doesn't matter if i die anymore.”

His voice sounded so weak to his ears.

He was so _tired_.

“ It doesn't matter, and I- I thought I could save everyone.” he let out a small laugh.

“ It doesn't even matter, it didn't even work.”

Pidge let out a choked noise, her eyes were filled with fire. “ Thank _fucking_ god it didn't Keith, do you ha-do you ever even think! You can't do these things Keith! This is the first time we've seen each other for weeks! We should be celebrating our victories, not worrying over your self-destructive behaviour!”

Keith felt nothing, then he felt everything. He couldn't do this, his emotions were to out of hand right now.

There was too much rage, so much anger.

So much shame.

“Then why aren’t you celebrating!”

“Because we fucking love you!”

He’d heard wrong.

There was no way.

“We love you! And you never talk to us! You never tell us what's wrong, your always just keeping your problems to yourself like they'll go away! You didn't even tell us what happened! We had to hear it from _Matt_ , After you _fainted_. ”

Keith needed to leave, he couldn't breathe, the walls wer-the corridor was to small. He needed space, he needed to be alone.

He needed to run

_Again_.

“ I'm sorry.” He winced at how hoarse his voice sounded.

“ I’m so, so sorry”

He wa so stupid. So stupid and so afraid, all they wanted to do was _help_.

_Keith needed help._

“ I was just being stupid, I swear it wasn't anything. I won't do anything stupid like that ever again.”

_But he wasn't ready for it yet_.

He knew it wasn't what they wanted, not even close. But Keith wasn't ready to give it to all of them yet.

Lance looked at him as if he knew exactly what was going on in Keith’s head.

“Come on guys, I'm going to go get some rest. Keith should too.”

And that was that. Slowly the group began to disperse, there were things that needed to be done after all.

Keith barely had time to shoot Lance a thankful look before he to, was walking away.

Listening to the sound of echoing footsteps, Keith was alone again.

 

He got no sleep that night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've finally figured out how the story will go.
> 
> so I'm just gonna say if your looking for a clean, clear plot. just leave.
> 
> this story is basically Keith's perspective on the world changing.


	4. The reason for locks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Keith? Keith ! Buddy, Shiro didn't mean it like that.”
> 
> Right. He wasn't back there, he was in space. In the dining room. As the only friends he'd had in years watched him hold back tears.
> 
> Stop being so selfish.
> 
> Keith's voice was hoarse.
> 
> “I am not selfish,”
> 
> Then he fled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this took FOREVER.   
> I APOLIGIZE since I was rushed with the holiday, but it's longer than the other chapters.

It hadn't changed.

When Keith had left to join the Blade, he'd expected the team to turn his room into a storage cabinet, maybe a room for Matt.   
Keith hadn't really taken a look at the room last night, he'd had a lot on his mind and his main focus had been on becoming unconscious.

But now that Keith had finally woken up from tiring and restless dreams, he realized just how little the room had changed.  
His lion slippers were still laying on the floor, a reminder of his habit of throwing things when he was in a fit of rage.

In the closet laid a few pairs of his old clothes, Keith had been in such a hurry to abandon the castle once leaving the team, he hadn't gone to his room and collected his things, mostly just leaving them there.

Even the room itself was clear of dust, he hadn't been gone for that long, but it was as if someone had been maintaining it, keeping it exactly as it had been left. Like Keith would come back.

He didn't know how he felt about that.

Slowly he slid out of his room and headed for the bathroom.

-

Keith had been in the shower for to long.

He kept telling his body to get out, someone could knock any minute and he’d be forced to make conversation while soaked in water. Not that it was water? Pidge had once told them that the castle didn't actually use water, but apparently, some similar chemically formulated liquid, that's main purpose was cleansing. Keith hadn't asked how she'd found out, and had left before she went into details.

Whatever it was, Keith knew he should be getting out of it now. The paladins were probably awake, and the Blade wouldn't wait for him if they were planning on leaving today. Not to mention Lotor.

But showers at the Blade had to be _excruciatingly_ short and cold. So Keith bathed in the soft silence and heat for the few moments he could.

_Knock knock_

“Dude. _Hello_. Who’s hogging the shower?” Pidge’s accusing voice frightened Keith enough for him to slip on the floor.

“What was that sound? Are you ok?”

Keith scrambled up, and managed to knock down all the shampoo bottles in the process.

“You know, if you don't say anything I'll assume your an intruder and break down the lock on this door”

_No no no no. Shit_.

Keith cleared his voice, trying to regain any sense of pride he still might have left. “ it's fine Pidge. It's just me.”

“ _Oh_! Keith,” Apparently, whomever Pidge had been expecting it wasn't him.

“Yah, I'm just. Give me a second and I'll be right out,” he croaked.

He’d been in the shower for way to long.

/

After an awkward transitional shuffle between the two, Keith headed off to the dining room. His stomach was growling and now that one paladin knew he was awake, it wouldn't have been long before the others found out.

At the dining room, he was greeted by hush whispers and the faint smell of something baking.

Shiro and Lance sat in the middle of the table, discussing something that Keith couldn't hear. Coran was bothering Hunk, whose eyes were solely on the makeshift pancakes he were preparing, and Allura was speaking to the mice softly. Again, no one noticed him.

Keith sat down across from Lance, frightening him enough to cause him to let out a small screech.

“Jesus Christ, where the hell did you come from”

“ my mother.”

Lance gave him a look, “your sense of humour is appallingly,”

“Pot calling the kettle black.”

Hunk set down a plate in front of them and sighed. Keith noticed Pidge entering the room and gave her a small nod.

“Remember a few months ago when you guys were just beginning to get along. What happened to that.”

“We haven't talked in weeks”

“All the more reason,”

Keith huffed, why couldn't they just understand that nothing was the same anymore. It would make this so much _easier_. “Are we going to speak to Lotor today?” Shiro froze mid air from diving into his breakfast and cleared his throat.

“Well, yes In a few hours. But Keith, um, there is no ‘ _we_ ’ me and Allura shall speak to him alone.”

“And me.”

Shiro glared, “Keith I'm serious,he could be dangerous, I don't want him knowing any of the paladins.”

Keith matched him with a look of his own.” So am I, also I'm not a paladin, loophole.”

Shiro’s hand was shaking now.”Keith this is not a _game_! You aren't going to speak to him and that's final, You are the _last_ person allowed to speak to him!”

“Why?” Keith’s voice wasn't loud anymore, he’d realized people listened to commands more if they were quiet.

It still didn't remove the venom from it, and Keith was left with silence.

Keith stood up, he heard Hunk say something to him, but he took no notice to it as he marched over to Shiro, smacking his hands down on the table in front of him.

“I _said_. Why?” Shiro wasn't intimidated by this, Keith knew he wasn't. That wasn’t going to stop him.

“I do not have to explain it to you Keith.”

“You don't have the right to keep it from me either.”

“Keith, do not argue with me”

“Your not the boss of me anymore _Shirogane_. Tell me why,”

“No.”

_Why was he making something so simple, so difficult?!_ “I don't get why not. I just want information before I go back to the Blade,”

He was met by silence, maybe Keith would have been proud of the fact, if he'd not noticed Shiro’s change in expression and the rooms change in atmosphere.

“What is it?” He addressed this to Hunk, as the nicest he should automatically be the easiest to break. Right?

“What is what?”

Exasperation filled Keith’s bones, he was so sick of this, so sick of everyone. No wonder he had trust issues, the people who had been crying over him yesterday, we're now suddenly keeping secrets from him.

“I'm not an idiot, I know that all of you know why I can't see Lotor, and I also would like to know what's happening with the Blade.”

“Nothing’s happening with the Blade.”

Keith stared down Hunk, fine, he'd just get it out of someone else. His eyes flew towards Pidge, who was looking everywhere but him. He was met with similar reactions with Allura and Lance before his eyes landed on Coran.

Keith glared.

Nothing.

_Harder_.

Coran’s hand twitched slightly.

_More venomously._

A tap with his foot.

Than Keith changed motives,he'd learnt the best way to get through to old people was to surprise them into surrender. Slowly he looked at the man with soft pleading eyes.

Keith felt him break. When he used that look, they all did.

“ Shiro doesn't think you're emotionally capable enough to speak with Lotor and he also persuaded the Blade to let us keep you with us for a couple of months so we could take care of yo- _Quiznack_!”

“Damn it Coran!” A chorus of voices echoed through the room, but Keith heard none of it.

_Control your temper, control your temper, control yo-_

_Fuck it._

“When were you planning on _fucking telling me that_. _Huh_. Not emotionally _capable_ enough. I'm not a child and this is _bullshit_.”

Shiro shot up,”Well stop treating you like a child when you stop acting like one!"

"I'm _not_ acting like one!"

"Keith you've had a very frustrating past few days but this is where it stops. You are not allowed to go near him, _clear."_

_"why not._  I'm the one who's been _looking_ for him!"

"this isn't about you!"

"I know that!"

Then stop being so _selfish_!”

No, no. I'm _not_ selfish.

_Don't call me selfish._

_You of all people should know that._

\

“ _No! No! Mama don't leave!”_

_A small Keith was clinging on to his mother's arm. He didn't remember anything about his mother, how she had looked, how she had treated him. Just this conversation._

_“Keith, my love, I have to go,”_

_“No! Your not allowed to go.”_

_“Keith, let go of me! I need to go.”_

_“You can't leave me, parents aren't supposed to leave their kids!”_

_“Keith for gods sake, stop crying, what have I said about crying, you're to sensitive, you cry over everything,”_

_“Your my Mama, you should be comforting me, not leaving!”_

_“Keith. Stop being so selfish! Think of someone else for once in your life!_ ”

/

“Keith? _Keith_  ! Buddy, Shiro didn't mean it like that.”

Right. He wasn't back there, he was in space. In the dining room. As the only friends he'd had in years watched him hold back tears.

_Stop being so selfish_.

Keith's voice was hoarse.

“I am _not_ selfish,”

Then he fled.

/

Keith’s first idea had been to grab his things and head off into space, than he'd remembered he didn't pilot anything on this ship. His second had been to hole up in his room, but they could find him easily there.

Keith headed for the dungeon.

It was a few staircases underneath Coran’s room, and the only reason he knew about it was because of a prank Pidge had tried to play on him months ago.

The place was eery and Keith hated it. Small balmera crystals lit the prison cells, and there was enough dust to drown him. It didn't help that the walls had some freaky glory magic that made them appear as your least favorite colour.

It especially didn't help that Keith didn't have one.

So there Keith was silently walking through them, he didn't need to search the cages, he had a feeling he knew which cell Lotor was in.

If it could even be considered a cell.

Keith stood at the door. It was a fading black, so different from the flashing and changing colors surrounding him. This door, unlike all the others on the ship, looked quite earth like. It was made of a substance quite similar to wood, and had a small wooden handle, Keith tried it.

Locked.

Of course it was. _Quiznack_ Keith was stupid. Shiro must have guessed he'd try something like this, why _wouldn't_ he? The man didn't seem to have an ounce of trust left for Keith.

_Cmon cmon, I really need to get in there_.

It was useless, it wasn't like the door would miraculously open, and Keith wasn't stupid enough to try and knock down the door when he knew it had sensors.

_Please please, just give me something, anything._

It was with that that Keith noticed something gleaming on the floor.

A small shard of Balmera crystal.

This could work.  
.  
.  
.  
.  
 _Click_.

On the other side of the door laid a set of Unbreakable bars lined and barricaded with barbed wire.

Sometimes Keith feelt Alteans were a little over dramatic.

“Oh, and who are you? I didn't get the pleasure of seeing _your_ face a few days ago” An elegant voice piped.

Passed the mess of bars and wires sat an attractive young man. He had his arms tied up above him, attached to the wall, and he had multiple chains forcing him to sit cross legged. Keith felt that the man might have once looked elegant, but his hair was flying everywhere, and there were heavy bags under his eyes. The man seemed too tired to even sit up straight.

Keith snorted, somehow he'd been expecting more.

The ma- Lotor, growled at him. “Do you find my situation amusing paladin, you try being locked up after attempting to have a reasonable conversation about an alliance.”

Keith tried to gain back his composure, this was not the time to have post sadness giggles.

“First off, I'm not a paladin. Second, I'm afraid I can laugh at you since you've attempted to kill and mislead me multiple times,”

Lotor’s eyebrows furrowed. “If you don't pilot a lion than when have I ever mislead you?”

“That's none of your concern,”

“ Really, hmm. Black hair, violet eyes, pearling gaze. One of my old generals also mentioned fighting a paladin who looked extremely like you, so why I wonder. Why were you a paladin then and not now?”

Keith crouched down very slightly so that through the bars, they were the same height. It annoyed him immensely how close in height they were while the galra was sitting.

“That is none of your concern Lotor, and if you know what's good for you, you'll answer my questions.”

“So you know who I am, now I wonder if I can figure out who you are,”

_“Why the Quiznack did you do it,_ ”

“As I said, I wanted an alliance,”

Keith leaned in, “ That’s bullshit and we both know it, so you better speak cause I'm not leaving till I gain at least a little information.”

“Why not return with the black paladin? He's _much_ more threatening than you are.”

Keith shot up, this man who he’d been chasing down for _months_ had _not_ just said that he wasn't threatening.

“Listen here you little bi- I'm not even going to use the word cause I'm sure you don't know what it means. But I did not just leave the Paladins of Voltron to chase you down, and then break into your prison cell when they didn't let me speak to you so that you could say that I wasn't threatening enough! I have had enough crap from everyone on this ship, and I do not need it from a quiznacking prince. So just fucking say something before I go stab myself, cause I am done with things not going my way!”

Lotor was silent, Keith watched him scan him, an unreadable expression on his face, than slowly he spoke.

“ banished prince,”

“ What?”

“You called me a prince, but you see, I've been exiled, and the entire galra race is to kill me on sight. All my generals have betrayed me, and I cannot stay hiding in space forever.”

It clicked. “The enemy of my enem- of course! You came to us cause you don't want to die.”

Lotor scowled, “I don't know why I told you, it wasn't the best course of action to trust a puny human.”

“Part human.” Keith hummed.

“Huh?” The look of confusion was evident on the purple males face.

“You called me a _puny human_ , but I'm only part human. Probably just half,”

Lotor looked him up and down.

“You don't look like a half breed. Are you part gergibeonzie?”

“ I'm surprised you don't recognize the knife,” Keith patted his pocket and lowly took out his knife.

Something gleamed in Lotor’s eyes. “Part galra. Of course, I should have realized you were a member of the Blade of Marmora.”

“So you've heard of us,”

“You mess up my fathers plans greatly”

“ _Mess up_ , wait, you mean he's still alive?”

But Lotor didn't answer his question.

Instead he merely hummed. “I'd get going if I were you, I can hear some small animals searching the ship for you, ones about to look in the dungeon.”

Keith felt a spark of panic.

“ _Shit shit shit. THIS CONVERSATION ISN'T OVER_.”

Hurrying he quickly locked the door and bolted up to his room as quietly as he could. Locking the door behind him.

Hilarious how he could despise locks so much one moment, and be extremely grateful to them the next.

They had power over you.

Keith thought back to his conversation with Lotor. It hadn't gone as planned, and Keith had left with much less information than he had planned.

But it was information nonetheless.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So yup. Another chapter posted. 
> 
> Comments are appreciated!


	5. The reason for snacks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It had taken much less than an hour for Shiro to come back, and he'd brought Allura with him.
> 
> Goodbye dear world, I had a really shitty time but it wasn't your fault. Thanks for all the really cute guys i never dated. 
> 
> “Keith if you don't open the door this second I’ll make Coran cut you off from training the entire time you're here.”
> 
> “ Door, open”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made a Tumblr! my username is also wolfinameadow on it. if you'd like to check it out.

“Keith open the damn door! I know you're in there and god help me-”

 

“What do you want,” Keith tried to make his voice appear as monotone as possible. He’d known it was coming, but he was definitely not prepared for this conversation. Or anyone at all.

 

The first to stop by had been Hunk, dropping by a plate once he'd realized Keith had returned to his room. Lance had gone next, just thinking about it made Keith’s stomach plumet. Lance had stood outside trying to get Keith to open the door, until he left with a small sigh that had made Keith want to rip the door off its hinges, and told Keith took get  _ some rest. _

 

Keith had not gotten any rest, he’d been laying in bed sketching for at least an hour or two when Shiro had stopped by, he’d simply stated that he knew Keith wasn't going to open the door, and told him that he was off with Allura to speak with Lotor. If Keith had not already met the prince, he’d have probably thrown something at the door. Instead he opened up a new page and started sketching Lance, he might as well since he’d be dead in an hour.

 

It had taken much less than an hour for Shiro to come back, and he'd brought Allura with him.

 

_ Goodbye dear world, I had a really shitty time but it wasn't your fault. Thanks for all the really cute guys I never dated.  _

 

“Keith if you don't open the door this second I’ll make Coran cut you off from training the entire time you're here.”

 

“ Door, open”

 

The door quietly slid open at Keith’s command, and he was met by a flaring Shiro. His new haircut still looked unfamiliar, but Keith couldn't help but recall how almost the exact same thing had happened when Shiro had found out about Keith dropping out of the Garrison.

 

Things had been different then.

 

Now Keith was no longer a paladin, now Keith didn't have anyone he could talk to, now Keith kept secrets from Shiro, now Keith had things he wanted to live for but knew he never could.

 

Now, Shiro wasn't walking in alone.

 

“Please tell me he was lying,”

 

“Who was lying,” it hadn't come out as a question.

 

Shiro looked at him as if he were his next victim in a murder spree, but before he could say (or scream) anything else, Allura cut him off.

 

“ Keith, please. We know you know what we're talking about, and while I as well would enjoy clobbering you for your immature actions, we have someone waiting for us. So get up or would you like me to carry you to the dungeons, because a few minutes ago i was eyeing one that had your name written all over it.”

 

Keith got up

 

The walk to the dungeon was painfully awkward, Keith had no idea why they were dragging him along. He cleared his throat.

 

“ So,um… why am I here?” Keith was going to kill himself if his actions didn't do it first.

 

“ Were visiting Lotor, we’d like to try and get at least one piece of information out of him today.” Shiro was staring straight ahead, but Keith could see the muscles in his neck bulging.

 

“I got that, but why am I tagging along all of a sudden?”

 

“What? You met him once and now you're already bored of him? Going to look around for more dangerous people who could get you killed? Are you really that desperate to di-”

 

“Shiro.” Allura cut him off, not gently. She turned her head to face Keith.

 

“ we attempted to speak to Lotor, but he informed us that he wouldn't give us any information without a certain  _ part galra ex-paladin _ of some sort. Shiro is only concerned that Lotor got more information out of you meeting him than you did.”

 

“I got plenty of information,” Keith argued. Allura didn't listen, instead slowly grabbing the key to the cell from her pocket and opening the door.

 

Lotor looked the same as when Keith had last seen him, ( Of course Keith, it's only been a chapter aka 3 or 4 hrs) the prince noted their arrival and Keith watched as his ears noticeably perked up at his arrival.

 

Was he some kind of dog?

 

“ Ah, mystery man, I see your back. Did you miss me?”

 

“ if you mean I want to scoop your head out as if it was a pumpkin on Halloween, then yes.”

 

“ What's a Halloween?”

 

Allura cleared her throat silently, as if to try and make Lotor aware of her presence.

Keith felt a small pang for Allura, it wasn't her fault she tell when she was being ignored, some people had talents in other places.(yes ladies and gentlepaladins, your witnessing KEITH make fun of someone else's communication skills)

 

“Right, anyways. They said you wouldn't talk unless I was here, so now i'm here, and now i'm leaving,” Keith had really thought it might work, but to his disappointment he felt Shiro pull him back in as soon as he stepped foot out of the cell.

 

“Keith, stay.”

 

Keith huffed, Why did Shiro have to be such a big brother at times, he was beginning to understand why so many people complained about their siblings. Keith sat down on the cold floor and glared at them.

 

“Go on than, talk.”

 

“ I really don't think you should be mad right now Keith, you have no right to be mad at us after the stunt you pulled.”

 

“ That's not going to stop me”

 

Hiro let out a deep sigh for the thousandths time and turned his head to whisper something in Allura’s ear.

 

“So your name is Keith? Not a very Galran name in my opinion, do you know what would fit you better, Rexlon.”

 

“I'm not changing my name.”

 

“ I'm only being informative Rexlon,”

 

Keith was pretty sure Allura had a cold with all the fake coughing she was doing.

 

“Keith? May you please fill us in on the information you've gained from our guest?”

 

“You mean prisoner,” Lotor chimed unhelpfully.

 

Keith wanted to get out of this cell as soon as possible, so he told them about the conversation he had with Lotor. What information he’d gained, and what information Lotor could have gained from him.

 

“There, can I leave now?”

 

“Depends on whether or not Lotor is willing to speak,”

Lotor just shrugged.

 

“ i do not know what information you want for me, I don't know my father’s plans because I didn't care for them, if you want information on him than I'm not the one to ask. There is also the slight problem that I am in chains. I understand you might not trust me, but you really aren't going to get much from me this way.”

 

“Than what do you propose we do, Throw you a feast?”

 

“Or you could unchain me and give me a room, a feast does sound quite pleasant though.”

 

Okay, nope. Keith had a stalkerish drawing with his name on it, and right now showing it off to Lance sounded better than being stuck in this small, cramped room with A) a man who was completely pissed at him and seemed to be doing everything he was capable of to make Keith feel bad, B) a woman who seemed to obviously have no idea what to do with him, nor understand his actions, and C) a banished prince who seemed to by eyeing him up like a toy right now.

 

“Okay, obviously we're not getting any more information today, so I'm leaving to train.”

 

“Right. Also, Keith your banned from the training room.”

 

_ What?!  _ Keith stopped in his tracks.

 

“What?!”

 

“ You heard me. No training until you step up your act, I've already gotten Coran to remove your fingerprints from the training room. Also if you try and get someone else to open the door for you, i’ll know.

 

Keith was sick of this, of him. Why had he even wanted to come back? Here Shiro did nothing but treat him like an out of control animal, and whatever Shiro did, the paladins followed.

 

Keith stomped back up stairs, making the loudest amount of  noise he could.

 

It wasn't fair.

 

\--------------------------------------

 

Keith had not left his room since then, he guessed it was about 3am in Earth time and there was no way he could go another second without anything to eat.

 

Keith ate a lot, he couldn't help it. It wasn't like he’d gain weight with how often he trained. So why not? He didn't even think it had anything to do with feeling hungry, it was just the feeling and texture of having something in your mouth. It kept him preoccupied.

 

He found it strange how when he was stressed he could go days without leaving his room, but the moment he felt emotionally turmoiled, hed end up craving to visit  the most popular room, especially since he never let anyone see him in such a state.

 

Keith grabbed an armful of alien snack from the cupboard. Bless Hunk for knowing Keith’s habits. Bless Hunk for filling up a cabinet with sweet snacks to satisfy Keith’s needs.

 

Keith didn't feel like going back to his room, instead he decided to troll around.

 

Half an hour later Lance found him looking at the hologram of stars.

 

“What are you doing?”

 

Keith bolted up at the sound of another voice and made the ultimate mistake of dropping his sketchbook.

 

“Oh! Lance-um-hi, I me-What are  _ you  _ doing here?”

 

_ Nice save. _

 

Lance immediately flushed and averted his gaze. “Well-um, I couldn't sleep so I was planning on just, looking at the stars.” He jerked his head up to the hologram and Keith understood.

 

Everyone knew Lance was incredibly homesick. 

 

“Anyway, once again. What are you doing here? I thought Shiro was going to fry you after the stunt you pulled.”

 

“He banned me from the  training room,”

 

“Right.” Awkward silence filled the air and Keith was about to make some sort of excuse and leave when Lance bent down and picked up his sketchbook.

 

_ Nope. _

 

Keith lunged and snatched the book out of Lance’s hand.

 

“Jeez Louise, dude it's just a sketchbook. I’ve seen you draw before.”

 

_ Ya but you haven't seen me draw  _ you _ before, and that's basically what half this sketchbook consists of. _

 

There was also the fact that Keith never seriously drew in front of the others. He did small sketches sure, but he didn't really try with them. His actual art was a piece of him. One he didn't enjoy sharing.

 

“Sorry, its just that some of the drawings are um, private.”

 

Lance nodded understandingly and sat down on the floor, he patted the spot next to im and Keith realized he was supposed to sit down too.

 

He did so with record breaking awkwardness.

 

“Um, sorry if you don't want to answer, but are you okay buddy?”

 

“What?” Lance huffed and crossed his arms.

 

“ It’s just. You've been acting really off, even before you left for the Blade it was like something was bothering you. Also you keep changing moods really fast, you looked so heartbroken after the healing pod, and then at breakfast you looked frustrated and now your just, I don't know? Distant? If you want to talk i'm here. You know that right?”

 

Keith felt his heart skip a beat.

 

Lance knew there was something wrong.

 

Lance wanted to talk to him about it.

 

Lance cared.

 

_ Lance. _

 

Keith silently opened up his sketchbook and flipped to a certain page.

 

He’d drawn it last night, in a fit of tears and restlessness.

 

When you first looked at the drawing you’d think it was just fully colored black. But glimpsing at it again, you'd realize that it was two different shades filling the page.

 

One shade showed a drawing of a small boy, it was obvious who, standing by himself. The boy looked lonely. He’d been crying, and in his arms was a small unraveling  stuffed hippopotamus

 

The surrounding image was of tree branches, grabbing o to the boy and slowly pulling at him.

 

As if the boy himself was a stuffed toy.

 

As if he was slowly unravelling.

 

Keith tore the page out and handed it to Lance before getting up.

 

o n his way out, he turned his head to look at Lance.

 

“Ok”

 

Lance looked up from the page. “Ok?”

 

“I'll come to you,”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So yup, Another chapter.
> 
> How'd you like it?


	6. The reason for trust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Right so in reality, your being handcuffed to a partner for a week,”  
> 3,2,1  
> “Coran no-”  
> “Are you on nunvil right now-”  
> “What about battle-”  
> “We have a purple freak in our basement and you want us to get kin-”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr: Wolf in a meadow  
> SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG.  
> I literally have no excuse other than having no idea what to write.  
> Its longer than the others though.

__

Keith should have known he’d miss something in his slumber, of course he would. Keith didn't sleep often, when he did waking him up was almost as hard as talking him out of a fight, (only possible if its the right person doing it, but Keith doesn't know that yet) impossible.

So of course, of  _ fucking course,  _ a quiznacking galra fleet would attack and Keith would sleep right through it.

Keith woke up feeling more refreshed than he had in months, blissfully unaware of the chaos he’d missed. Instead he chose to panic like a high school girl. He paced around his room trying to keep his breath steady as he recalled the events from the previous day. He and Lance had only talked for a moment, but Keith felt as if they’d made a connection, for just one moment they hadn't been friends, or rivals, or allies. They’d been Lance and Keith, both somehow needing solace in a way only the other could understand.

Both painfully lonely.

Keith knew that Lance would never make fun of the vulnerability he’d seen in Keith last night, sure Lance said stupid things sometimes, but Keith had seen Lance stop in the middle of an attack to comfort a crying mother, her dead child in her arms, lifeless and quiet.

Lance had not even paused before putting away his bayard and gently kneeling in front of her, Keith would never forget how heartbroken Lance had seemed as the woman sobbed hopelessly in his arms, begging Voltron to save her baby.

Keith wondered if Lance had seen his own mother in that moment.

Lance hadn't noticed Keith, and Keith usually tried not to think about the small vulnerable moment he’d stolen, a small unforgiving secret he’d witnessed. Keith used it now shamefully to remind himself that Lance wouldn't hurt him. That Lance was faithful.

Thoughts endlessly nagged in his head, unmerciful and hurtful. What if Lance didn't know what to do with him? What if Lance got tired of dealing with him and was to afraid to tell him?

What if the others found out?

Well that's was a stupid thought, there wasn't even anything to  _ find out _ , well other than the fact that Keith was a fucking mess, but he was pretty sure they’d already guessed that.

There was nothing Keith could do but face the day.

Once Keith left the bathroom he searched for signs of life.

He found Coran in the Stasis bay, and one look at the man told him something was wrong.

Coran’s hair was wild, hanging around like ramen noodles, his eyes looked bloodshot and the light of system alarms blaring cat a shadow on his frustrated expression. Keith knew this expression, there’d been an attack. “ Coran where are the others,”

Coran jumped at the sound of Keith’s voice, spinning around with a broken stick from god knows where and visibly relaxing once he recognized the figure.

“Ah, number 4, where have you been? Where you sleeping, sorry if i woke you up. Did you know that when i was yo-”

“Where are the paladins, Coran?” It came out sharper than he’d intended but he was panicking to hard to really care.

“Well um, they’ve run into a small… problem with a passing flee- Keith no!”

Keith was already walking out the door, but Coran grabbed him by the collar before he could get to far.

“What are you doing!”

“Nope, nope. I afraid your on lockdown my boy. As well you’ve already missed the fight, the paladins are on their way back this tick,”

“They're all fine?” Coran nodded. “None of them ran into any trouble?” Coran tensed and Keith was once again making his way to the bridge.

“Keith, no stop! Quiznack have you always been this much of a handful? They’re all physically fine, there was just a small… miscommunication?”

As if on cue, the bridge door opened up and arguments filled the air. 

This was not what Keith had been expecting, the team looked fine, other than a few small cuts here and there. Pidge and Hunk looked tired, Keith felt for them. Allura on the other hand looked like she was ready to take down Zarkon herself, her hair was messily falling out of her bun, if not for the expression she wore Keith would have said she looked elegantly powerful.

Keith was snapped out of his seemingly strange thoughts at the sound of a shout.

Lance and Shiro were standing by door arguing, Lance flapped his arms around, screaming about something Keith couldn't hear. Shiro was looking down at the younger male, his arms were folded and if not for the fact that he chose that moment to run his hand through the small tuft of hair on his head, Keith would have thought he was lecturing the Red paladin.

Keith also couldn't help but notice that Lance’s armor looked more damaged than the rest of the group, there was a small visible cut on his cheek, and Keith could see his arm sagging a little, as if he was fighting to hold it up.

“Keith! Hey, where were you earlier?” Pidge’s small voice broke Keith’s trance and he turned to face the younger girl, Keith would never admit it out loud, but he was silently thankful for Pidge’s height. Being on a team with a bunch of tall asses was rough, and they occasionally bonded on the struggles of shortness. Pidge seemed to be ignoring the argument going on between her teammates, a strange action for someone usually so observant.

He silently reminded himself that Pidge had asked him a question and 

murmured a small comment about him being asleep. This visibly brightened Pidge in a way that hurt Keith.

“Asleep, really?! That's great, we were all so worried you’d never actually get some rest- and a nap doesn't count Keith,”

“Says you,” Pidge cracked a smile at this and Keith felt his heartstrings snap. God he adored this midget.

“So…” he began “what's going on with them?” he jerked his head in Shiro and Lance’s direction, who were  _ still arguing. _

“Oh them? Don't think much of it Keith, this always happens. I mean we’ve all been a little affected since you left. But the thing is that in Voltron, the Red paladin is supposed to be the Black paladins right hand man, and the Black paladin is meant to listen to the Red paladin.”

Shiro and Lance have never really had to work together before this so… well they both kind of suck. Lance more often  _ orders _ around Shiro than give him advice, and Shiro just blatantly ignores what Lance says, which sucks since Lance is usually right. Yah so anyway most missions these days lead to, well this. They’ll argue for about an hour, we’ll eat some gross goo and than everything will be back to normal.” Pidge’s voice wavered at the end.

“Are you sure?” Pidge nodded, but Keith could see the small hesitance in her actions, as if she was trying to convince herself more than him.”what happened Pidge,”

Pidge huffed and turned away from him, “ It’s just that this time their argument almost got us killed, they’ve been arguing since before the attack even happened. Literally, and the topic always comes back to  _ you.” _

Keith wasn't even fucking surprised, silently he gave Pidge a small hesitant hug, which she seemed almost recoil from in shock, than he headed over to the disaster zone. As he moved closer the sounds became more clear..

-immature to blame me.”

“Immature?! You almost got us fucking killed because you  _ refuse _ to listen to my ideas!”

“We survived Lance, that's what matters,”

“That's what you say every fucking time Shiro, how long till your actions kill one of us, Me? Hunk? Pidge?  _ Keith?” _

“Keith wasn't on the battlefield Lance,”

“You think you can keep him off of it for long?, He lives to fight Shiro.”

“What I do is none of your concern Lance,”

“It is if I'm supposed to be your ‘right hand man’ not that I can be with a stick up your ass possessing you every fucking hour of the day!”

“ Lance stop getting mad whenever I don't agree with one of your _goddamn_ ideas!”

“  _ One of them?!  _  Name one fucking idea I've had in the past month you’ve listened to. Do you even trust me?!

“You know what, I-” Shiro’s words were silenced when Keith threw a hand over the man’s mouth. This seemed to gain both their attention and he felt them flinch at the anger  radiating off of his body.

“Are you guys  _ children.” _ Keith wasn't sure if he was more angry or frustrated, he wasn't sure if there was even a difference between them anymore.

“ I fucking leave the team hoping it’ll strengthen Voltron and I come back from basically having a chess marathon with death to find out that the only problem stopping this team from blossoming is that the leader can't get along with his right-hand man?!”

The two don't answer, a voice in his head is telling Keith that this speech is somehow hypocritical, but he doesn't care enough at the moment to figure out how. 

“ We have a prisoner locked up in a fucking dungeon in the basement, Allura’s probably being left to deal with political aftershock of attacks by herself,  _ again,  _  and i have just woke up from the first good night rest in months to find this?! We have things we need to deal with, and if you guys think you can spend hours trying to get me to talk about my feelings when you cant even communicate with your comrades?. I'm fu-”

“Keith, we get it.” 

“I don't think you do, but I’m done.”

Keith turned around, as he left the room, his steps echoing in the silence, he felt  all pairs of eyes on him, but he didn't really care.

Honestly why couldn't the doors here be normal, did Alteans not understand the fact that slamming doors was a major for of stress relief for earthling?

It took awhile for him to calm down his temper, and once he had Keith knew that it would have been best to keep his mouth shut, but he couldn't help how fucking annoyed he’d been at them. They both meant a lot to him and watching them bicker like children was almost painful.

Oh god, he’d shouted at Lance. That wasn't anything knew, they argued all the time. But their friendship had  _ just  _ started growing, Lance was probably going to think this was an invitation to making things how they used to be.

Keith realized the best way to hide that fact that you were basically drooling over someone, was to squash those feelings in a jar while he was outside the comfort of his own room, it wasn't as hard as people might think. They were fighting a war in space, there was a lot more to worry about than whether Lance was into di-

“Keith! Are you in there? I'm beginning to think your spending an unhealthy amount of time in your room nowadays,”

“Well seeing as there's nothing else to do Allura, I don't where else I could be,”

“Out here for starters? Coran wants us all to meet in the training deck,”

“No thanks, I'm banned from the training room, remember?”

“ Training  _ deck, _ and Coran says its not for physical training so you can come.” Keith groaned, it was obvious that Allura wasn't going to give up, so he got up and joined her outside.

The rest of the paladins were already there, sitting down in a circle wearing something on their he- as soon as Keith and Allura realized what was going on, they bolted for the door, as soon as they made contact with the entryway a small shock sent them reeling back.

“My boy the others already tried that, I'm quite shocked that your running too, weren't you the ones suggesting trust bonding?”

“Yah but I don't want to be a part of that! I'm not even on the team any-”Coran pressed a hand to his mouth muffling any comment from escaping.

“Hush hush, what's that earthling phrase, something about pr- peaching?”

“Its ‘practice what you preach’ Coran,”

“Exactly,”

So that's how Keith ended up sitting around in a circle cross legged with 5 armed paladins glaring holes into his soul.

“You guys can relax, we're not actually using the mind-melding helmets, i was just trying to frighten you” an echo of sighs rang through the room, somehow the more time the team spent together, the more secrets they kept.

“Right so in reality, your being handcuffed to a partner for a week,”

_3,2,1_

“Coran no-”

“Are you on nunvil right now-”

“What about battle-”

“We have a purple freak in our basement and you want us to get kin-”

Coran watched this silently before slowly pulling out a remote and pressing the big red button that laid on top.

_ BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP _

Hunk jumped, hitting Keith who fell on Lance, who flailed and smacked Pidge who tripped and smacked into the wall, scaring Shiro and Allura.

“Are you finished?” Corn cleared his throat , straightened his back confident and poised. “Now, as I was saying. The trust in this team has been decreasing faster than a Derakso’s head falls off. I've been brainstorming ideas on how to fix this and realized that were not going to get anywhere  _ forcing  _ bonds. So what better way than to pair up, so that everyone on the team had at least one person they can rely on by the end of it, and if there's already a bond. Than maybe it will manifest!

“You'll be handcuffed to your partner. You will sleep in the same bed, train at the same time, discluding the person partnered with Keith, and basically be stuck together. If one of you enters a bathroom, the handcuffs will automatically turn off. But the moment they leave, or their partner enters, the handcuffs will turn back on.

“ the handcuffs can be removed for formal gatherings and battles, though if your partnered with Keith you must take him with you in your lion. If  you have questions, feel free to speak. Princess, yes your participating.”

Allura’s hand immediately fell and matching everyone’s faces. Coran looked so pleased with himself that the others knew there was no getting out of this situation.

“Brilliant aren't I! Now for the pairs, at first I was thinking that Shiro and Lance needed some bonding time. But after a few quinents I realized that wouldn't be the smartest pair. Instead Allura, your with Shiro and Keith, you’ll be partnered with Lance. Hunk and Pidge, your partners cause of your little ‘project’. Now all of you, lift up your shirts!” Coran lifted a small jar of pukish looking cream and rubbed his hands together.

_ Is this really what I'm quiznacking living for. _

_ - _

_ “Ow!  _ Mullet this is  _ delicate skin _ . Stop rubbing like a maniac all over my torso!” Keith was trying very hard to ignore Lance, which was hard when a son of a mustache had forced him to rub some cream all over the man’s stomach area.

Keith tried to pay more attention to Pidge, carefully examining the cream as she lathered it on Hunk. Tried to focus on Shiro and Allura, both a blushing mess as they quietly argued on who should go first.

Keith was _not_ blushing, Keith was definitely _not_ paying attention to where his hands were roaming, he wasn't even going to _think_ about how no matter how soft Lance’s skin looked, the man had rock solid abs.

Nope. No sir. Keith was going to ignore this and get it over with, he would finish quickly than dump himself in cold, cold water before he even thought to do anything else with his hands.

“Keith are you even listening to me! Coran said  _ circular motions _ . Or else the handcuffs won't  ‘be bonded with our souls’ or some freaky shit like that,”

“It's hard to focus when you keep complaining,” Keith retorted, he was finding it incredibly hard not to look at Lance. It was one thing to be stuck in an elevator with him shirtless, and another to have his hands all over his,  _ smooth, hard, tanned stomach. _

_ Keith your thought privilege has been revoked, shut up. _

“Can you at least pay attention to what your doing?!”  _ Oh,  _ The whine in Lance’s voice was driving Keith over the edge. He'd managed to control himself for so long, why was he breaking now?!

Keith reluctantly looked up from his position on the floor and watched the area where his hands were rubbing in the cream.”I don't understand the point of this, how is this supposed to keep the handcuffs connected?”

“Coran said that your partner applying the cream instead of you doing it yourself will stop the handcuffs from making some mistake.”

Keith nodded and continued his work, Lance’s torso was smooth and silky due to the lotions he got from other planets. His back still had burns from the explosion he'd faced in the first few weeks of being in space, but it didn't have nearly as much scars as Keith’s did.

“I'm done,” Keith whispered, Lance slowly slid off the table and hoisted Keith off of his knees smirking. 

“Your turn,”

Keith felt Lance’s eyes on him as here moved his jacket and shirt. a wave of self doubt  flooded into Keith’s mind. He didn't take care of his skin nearly as much as Lance did, so maybe it was a little dry, a little rough here and there. No doubt his battle scars stood out against his pale skin. It was nothing compared to Lance.

Keith flinched when Lance placed his left hand on his torso to steady him, and the other boy immediately pulled away. “Oh sorry, did I..”

“No, I'm just not really used to um, contact?”

“Oh.”

Lance was more careful this time, slowly applying the cream, mumbling quietly.(“holy shit shouldn't your skin be like, dead. Why is it so soft. It's not fair if it's soft,” “your so skinny, didn't the galra feed you?”)

Lance worked continuously and Keith felt a cold chill run up his spine. Somehow having Lance’s hands on his body  was worse than his on Lance’s Keith tried to ignore the chills every time Lance brushed up one of his scars and instead decided to break the paper thin ice.

“Thank you.” His voice was so quiet that Lance had nearly heard it.

“For this. I know that my hands are great and all but you don-”Keith cut him off with a groan.

“ _ No.  _ Not  _ this.  _ For um… You know, uh.” Keith bit his lip. “For yesterday.”

Lance blinked up, looking him in the eye for the first time since starting, and Keith couldn't help noticing the blush on the the tanned boys face mirroring his own.

“Oh. For yesterday? Uh no problemo. I mean- anytime, no wait- Ugh.” Lance frowned up at him.

“You don't need to thank me for that you know, I was just being a good friend, it's something expected. We're here for you,”

Keith turned his head trying to keep the heat flaring his skin down. “Still. Thanks, it- it means  a lot.”

Lance smiled before turning back to his work, after a few beats of comfortable silence between the two, listening to Shito sputter as Alura pinned him down, Lance paused.

“Hey Keith?”

“Hm?” 

“Where’d you get this scar?” Lance pointed at a horizontal jab across Keith’s side. Keith guessed Lance wouldn't have paid much attention to it if it weren't for the fact that it visible shade more-  _ blue, _ than the rest of his scars.

“Oh-um, Marmora mission gone wrong. I think it was around  the day I left? I was stuck out in space, but my suit had a hole in it. It's better now- probably.”

Lance’s brow furrowed in confusion, which slowly morphed into horror.”Keith! It could have gotten infected! Not even that, didn't you go on a mission the next day? Did you give your injuries anytime to heal- like at all?”

Keith shrugged and pulled away, realizing that they were probably done and ready now. “Can you please not make a big deal out of it? It's just a small injury.”

That was a lie and Lance knew it. The incident had shaken Keith up unbearably, being stuck out in space. With no one surrounding you for miles.

All alone.

“Did you at least get some rest last night,” Lance sounded tired and Keith couldn't help but feel guilty. Lance had probably barely got any rest last night. Not to mention with everything happening today he wouldn't for a while.

“Yah, better than I have in a while actually,” Keith stated making Lance brighten up earnestly.

“Great, now are you ready to face our doom.” He joked.

“Depends if you can pull your weight.”

“Oh come on, don't you trust me?”

Keith cracked a small smile.

“Who knows?”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SOOO YUP  
> Also promise you this isn't turning into a 'stuck together for a week' fic.
> 
> its just a small part of the plan.


End file.
